A shiny pair of 'Anarchy' (HARDCOREZZZZ!) Creepers.
So I bought them.
And now I wear them.
They're much more comfortable then the pair of Destroyers I had earlier. Those were tightened by a single buckle on top, whereas I now have the control that laces allow!
It's a beautiful thing boys, not to mention the extra height and overall slimming of my legs. I am in post-cool-shoes-buying bliss.